Monday, December 18, 2017

How not to Worry about Worry

It may sound very unusual title but I mean it. I also know whatever I write, those who tend to worry will worry and those who don't wouldn't. But then the next question is, why do I put in efforts to write when either way it's not going to work because to worry or not to worry is more to do with individual nature which is difficult (and not impossible) to change. 
The answer also is contained in what i stated earlier, individual nature. What then makes me to write about How to not to worry about worry? I being an optimist by nature, its for me to try without worrying about the outcome (see, I have put the "Bhagwat Gita" teaching into use).
I also know that whatever I am going to write is not new and every one (almost) possibly knows about it. But what I am doing is akin to research, representing the facts and thoughts in a new (So do I think) manner. May be, someone same day would actually stop worrying after reading my pearls of wisdom.
Let me start.

 Life is full of uncertainties and that is the main cause of worry. It is also a fact that all human beings worry all the time. The question is, why some people look to be in total control of themselves while some others look perpetually worried. Everyone has worries, then how is it that some are able to bottle up the worries and keep them aside while others get almost crippled leading to inaction due to excessive worrying.
This major difference is because of individual nature but more than that, those who contain their worries have learned the art of overcoming the fear of uncertainty. Rather then procrastinating, they resort to acting on the worry to resolve it or if action is not feasible at that moment or if there seem to be no solution to that worry at that point in time they keep the worry aside. 
On the other hand, those who worry all the time, despite the fact that they know the futility of those worries, get overcome by worries. They, rather then acting on the things that need to get done to get over those worries (or just keeping them aside if there is no immediate solution available), become frozen in those worries thereby losing the capacity to act. Just like Arjun was in the opening situation of Mahabharata war, only problem is, Arjun had Lord Krishna to enlighten him about importance of Action over Procrastination while we have none.

The question is, where is the solution? The solution lies in training the Mind. Changing one's nature is difficult but it is very much doable. I speak from my own experience. I used to be such an angry young child till one day the futility of this angry nature donned on me. The moment futility was understood, nature changed to an extent that one day after I got married, my "better half"  asked me, don't you ever get angry. That "the individual nature" can be modified is hence proved.

The first thing to do is understand that worry is generally associated with those thoughts where it is evident that the individual has no control or little control over the circumstances around it while the outcome is important. Some people may, though, have a sheer habit of worrying (even when a simple action would resolve the worry) like people who have "Compulsive Obsessive Disorder".

However, sometimes the individual has the capability to act to sort out the worries but does not know or intentionally decides to procrastinate and worry. Worry clouds your judgement and ability to take risk and therefore earlier one learns to either act on them or just put them out of their mind in an imaginary locker till they get time, energy and motivation to deal with it.

everyone worries but those who learn to get over the worries or has ability to keep them aside lives a peaceful and fruitful life, for rest, worry is there to give them company. Why keep this bad company.

4 comments:

  1. Well penned . Leaves are especially apt to vary, In the same way Human mind is apt to vary in thoughts : good Vs Bad
    Good thoughts bring happiness and Bad brings worries . Though I know it’s not possible to avoid worries always yet we can try because worrying about the situations we can do something is useless and for the things we cannot do anything worries will be of no help.. Thank you for this lovely post at least few hours will be in peace without any worries..

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    1. Yes, optimism helps us to try when there is a fear of failure.

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  2. I agree with your thoughts, Sir. I am an optimist too but I try to make it sure that optimism doesn't blind me from anticipating the perils of any given situation. I also agree that being worried is a state of mind and one can train her/his mind in a positive way. Personally, my worries do not last long or rather, I don not allow them to. After all, there is no point pondering over something on which we have little or no control.....:-)

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    1. Well said Maniparna. Yes I agree that one needs to be pragmatic to understand and cope with perils of life, pure optimism in all circumstances is foolish.

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